Tuesday, August 27, 2019

Mallorca, Spain

We got to our room and died for about 3.5 hours. We knew we should not nap and waste daylight in such a gorgeous spot, but the body needs sleep.
Oh my, beautiful! 
I've never loved a heart more


We woke up refreshed and ready to explore a bit. The funny thing about staying in a nice resort is that sometimes it is just a little too fancy for you. The restaurants on campus (can't take the girl out of college administration) were just a bit highbrow for us. They were also having a "fashion show" so a ton of people were around all dolled up and we looked like refugees. We were told that the country club down the hill from the resort had food so we had the hotel golf cart drop us off there. The hotel campus was massive so you were driven in golf carts most of the time. This was actually kind of fun. It also helped keep the place beautiful because all cars were parked at the bottom of the hill. I love cars, but they can be unsightly.

Anyway, we get down to the country club only for them to tell us that they are closed. BAH!! A note about customer service in Spain: it does not exist. End of note. No, really, they do not have the notion of superior customer service. All visitors seem to notice it. They're very dismissive if something goes wrong and take no ownership. Across the board this is the attitude. It is something to which one must adjust.

Traveling is wonderful, but it can sometimes bring out parts of yourself that you were previously unaware of such as a die-hard belief that how "we" (Americans) do something is always the 100% right way. I actually think if more people traveled there would be less conflict as you just learn to adjust and adapt. While you may still think superior customer service is the correct method, you learn that backing employees over customers has some advantages, too. I also firmly believe that you travel to have new experiences so you have to fight expecting things to be "normal" when you're in a new place. Our continued time in Europe has beaten me down enough that I no longer order iced tea (it won't be brewed) and I expect to pay for my bottled still water. It doesn't even really cross my radar that I could ask for free tap water because that isn't the norm where I'm visiting and I don't want to push my norms onto them. I guess it is a respect thing. Whoops, tangent. I always wonder why blogging takes me so long. Now I know.
Ready to explore! 
Ok, all of my customer service discussion was to make the point that the woman working at the country club really went above and beyond to help us out. She gave us some ideas of where to eat in the nearby town since we weren't into the fancy, expensive food at the resort. She told us that a local pizza place was well-known for being just incredible so we settled on going there. We trekked back up the hill to retrieve our car keys (the golf carts were all helping other guests) so that we could head into town. We ran into a manager while waiting on our car and he made the mistake of asking Jackson how things were going. Most people say, "fine" and move on, right? Not old Honest Abe here. Jackson told him about being taken the country club for it to be closed, having to trek back, having to wait forever for our car to be brought around, how they charged us for the night we missed even though we called to cancel and Hyatt generally is flexible about such things. I mean I think he even complained about climate change. I'm unsure. This manager was so anxious to get the hell-o away from this grumpy American Jackson that he gave us free breakfast vouchers for the duration of our stay. WHAT!!!! That was worth like 150 euros (roughly $165). I told you the resort was pricey.

We finally got our vehicle and headed into town. Jackson walked me through parallel parking (sometimes this guy's patience is downright saintly) on a tiny side road and we wandered into the village. It was another happening place. It turns out that Germans love to vacation here so everything really catered to them. Since we cannot make a trip to Europe without my being mistaken for a German person, I felt right at home. We strolled around and then settled in for dinner at the pizza joint.

We went to order and realized that our menus were in German! Come again? It turns out the server glanced at me, assumed we were Germans and just seated us with those menus. Hilarious. We got it straightened out and they had English menus, too.

Jackson got truffles on his side because he is fancy. I got fungus (mushroom) and ham because I know what I like.
BREWED ICED TEA?
WE. HAVE. ARRIVED.
A pizza lover's dream

The woman from the country club did not lead us astray. That pizza was phenomenal. We wandered around town walking off dinner for a bit before returning to the hotel for an excellent evening of sleep!

We woke up the next day feeling human again. Naturally this meant we needed to stroll down for our free breakfast at the resort's restaurant. 

Views.

The little village could not be cuter

Jackson was chipper

...because the room had a Nespresso machine

Now let's stroll to breakfast...

Checking out where we'd spend the afternoon

We had a really nice breakfast near the pools then headed back up to the room to change so we could lounge all day. We found ourselves exploring the property first, though, as it was just gorgeous around every turn.



Literally extending an olive branch





Waiting on me to go to the pool...
We spent a few hours at the pool and then, magically, Jackson announced that we should hit the spa since we'd saved money on dining. I didn't care about the reason for his temporary insanity I just knew that I needed to act fast. I called and got us booked in for a couple's massage within the hour. The spa was just down from our room and it was just as gorgeous as one would expect. Jackson filling out the paperwork was a real treat: "Did you know they can make you skinnier with a massage?! I am checking that option." I just nodded. We got changed and they took us to relaxation rooms to wait for our treatments.
The views from the relaxation rooms were insane


I decided to just move in there

It was so zen
I have to preface this video by saying that I have never laughed harder in my life than when Jackson came into our massage room and showed me that his paper underwear fit "just a little funny." I HONESTLY THOUGHT THEY WERE GOING TO KICK US OUT BECAUSE MY ROAR OF LAUGHTER COULD BE HEARD ON THE MOON. I COULD NOT BREATHE. He'd put his little panties on backwards and just had his manhood all over the place. I am 100% sure the masseuse would have just carried on, but I had him fix himself up. Our masseuses came in and I still could not control myself. I had to really focus to stop laughing and enjoy my massage. I overcame the odds, though. It was a wonderful treatment. I could hear Jackson's occasional grunt and would tear up as I held in my laughter, but otherwise it was lovely.  



Once we'd recovered from the spa we headed back into another part of town for dinner. We stopped off at a renowned overlook first.
Not a bad view!

Jackson soaking it in

Date night!
We find that Italian is done quite well in Europe and is also a pretty safe bet for us so we had that style of food again. We were not disappointed.
Fried dough!

Delicious homemade pasta

Brownie with ice cream? YES, PLEASE! 
The next morning was sadly our last one. We were bummed to not get to spend more time at this lovely resort, but we think we'll be back. We had another free breakfast before spending a little more time soaking up the pools before it was time to get to the airport.
There were a ton of stairs

In my happy place!
Upon checkout we again asked them to reconsider charging us for the night we missed due to our travel issues and they refused, but said they would call Hyatt corporate to see if anything could be done. I was convinced that no changes would be made but about halfway to the airport we got an e-mail from Hyatt corporate saying they were refunding the unused night. Victory! It made our experience just that much better and sealed the fact that we'd return to this property. 

Now, onward to Switzerland! 

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