Where you're supposed to be

Do you ever go somewhere and just know that you're where you're supposed to be at that point in time? I do. A lot. It is usually a church service where I feel like the message was written especially for me. Today was one of those days for the both of us. Father's Day is never an easy day for Jackson. (I'm sure most of you know that Jackson's father, Charlie, died about 11 years ago after battling cancer.) I am an extremely sensitive person. Really. I cry at commercials, books, movies, you name it. Really. Anyway, I always get very teary when people discuss fathers when Jackson is around. I just miss Charlie for Jackson in a way that I never knew I could. 

Today is Father's Day so obviously church was very focused on dads. (Side note: I think we have decided that we like this church and will go there for the duration of our time in Colorado.) The pastor acknowledged that some of us missed our dads who had passed, some of us missed our dads who were never there and some of us just miss being with our dads today. I, of course, lost it at this point in the service. Jackson had to go get me tissues because I was in shambles. (S0 was he, but he was still functioning better than me.) It did not help the situation that two rows in front of us was a grandma (who looked so much like Jackson's mom from the side that it was uncanny), a grandpa, their son and his new daughter. (I do not know where mom was, but it was obvious that a woman dressed her in a gorgeous, fluffy pink dress and barrettes.) I love watching babies play with people. The Susie looking lady kept bouncing the baby and it kept reaching over and playing with grandpa. This made Jackson sad because we'd never get to sit in church like that with our future child (think 10 years from now) playing with Charlie and Susie. Of course this, too, sent me in to crying fits. It was not a pretty cry. Anyway, with all of this sadness that was a definite feeling that the pastor knew our struggles. He spoke to them in a way that only a man of God could. I really appreciated it.

I deeply missed being home today--especially since they had homemade chicken and noodles--yum! But I know that my dads know how much I love and appreciate them. I also know that my brother knows how proud I am of the father that he has been to my nephew. I am certain that being a parent is not an easy job (I know MacKenzie drives me crazy sometimes and she cannot even talk back!), but I sure appreciate all of the father figures in both of our lives.