G-parents

I have no idea when this photo was taken, but this is what my grandparents have always looked like to me so it cannot be too terribly old!

I sometimes call my Mom on my walk in to work. I called this morning to check in with her on how things are going down in Florida. She is down there this week as my Grandpa went to a hospice house this week. I think you all know that I'm a very emotional person. I also have always had a real soft spot in my heart for the crazy old lady that I call, "Grams." My Grams is absolutely hilarious. She does and says whatever she wants. She always has and it has always made me laugh. She is just as sweet as can be and I truly do adore her. Again, I always have. Some of my most fond memories of being a child are times spent at her house playing. She always made sure that we had fun things to do and were thoroughly entertained. Anyway, my Grandpa is really quite sick- hence hospice. I've cried myself to sleep a few times recently thinking about how sad I am for my Grams to be left all alone. I've only been married for four years (tomorrow is the actual anniversary of our wedding!), but I already know that a holiday season without my partner in life would be devastating. My Mom handed my Grams the phone this morning and I just lost it. I'm crying as I type this. I just am so sad about the entire situation. As I told my Grams this morning, I know that dying is a part of life, but that does not make it any easier.

The good news is that both my Mom and Uncle Derek (he lives in Hawaii) are with Grams and Grandpa in Florida right now. I think it is good for them all to be together one last time. It had been a long time since they'd all be in the same place and I think now is a perfect time to be together. I hate the helpless feeling of knowing that there is nothing that I can do to make anything any easier for any of them during this trying time. I hope that my Grandpa is not scared and can have peace knowing that we will all take care of Grams in his absence. I love you both, Grams and Grandpa. You've not been far from my mind recently.